when…

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when you’re chilling in your new girl’s tiny flat trying to let one thing lead to another and there’s a knock at the door,

when you’re chilling in your new girl’s flat that you’ve been trying to find out how she can afford to pay for – then there’s a knock at the door,

when you’ve just had a one night stand and woken up real early at the girl’s flat and suddenly there’s a knock at the door,

when you’ve met an Ex at Pariah State and taken her back to your place coz she’s familiar and your girl is out of town for the weekend – then you hear her voice at the door,

when you snuck a girl into your room from the party coz your mom would be out early for church – then she knocks on your door,

when your flat mate’s girl stayed over after everyone left last night and your flat mate is away for the weekend – you shmanged her – and then you hear him turning the key in the door,

when you’ve been silent and keeping very still and ignoring the psycho chick knocking at the door and then your phone starts ringing,

when your three women walk in through the door,

when your three women walk in through the door and one is pregnant,

when your three women walk in through the door and the wrong one is pregnant,

when your three women walk in through the door and the keeper is the only one not pregnant,

when your girl walks in with her father,

when a married woman you’ve been shmanging on the sly walks in with her husband,

when the husband of the woman you’ve been shmanging on the sly walks in with three CIO-looking goons,

when the hottie you hooked up with online walks in and she’s in school uniform,

when the hooker you picked up at the stag party comes back the following morning and “she” is not in drag.

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